A Friendship Ran Through It
When do destinations turn into cherished memories? When you finally utter the simple declaration, “I’ll go with him!” Doing just that did light fierce fires in hesitant hearts, while reviving a spirit once caught with its own long lost wishes. Those four words took me quite some time to actually speak. 65 years ago, three first graders found themselves in their parochial path of establishing friendships and lessons learned. In the end, these “three musty rears” became best friends and learned lessons far beyond the classroom walls. The “him” in the four word sentence is Vern, the nice guy. Not that “He’s a nice guy” kind of guy. In fact, he is more so the true definition of kindness.
All the time I managed to let everyone know what I wanted to do, he was readying himself to return to Montana for his sister’s 50th wedding anniversary. Let’s just say, the trip took a divided purpose. Vern decided I was to have an experience. He grew up with family vacations to Montana. As an adult, Vern’s love of fishing expanded the territory to Montana’s neighbor, Wyoming, and its mountains, lakes, and, perhaps, the country’s most beautiful park. The itinerary did indeed include the anniversary party, however, it's apparent there was going to be so much more.
Before we were on any airplane, it is important to note that Vern uniquely possesses the essence of kindness, patience, along with a fierce unconditional love. Most would laugh and point out that, if he agreed to travel with me, he was going to need every one of them. In my heart, he is a lot more. First and foremost, he has the very best name turned backward. Nonrev Namennarg. Practice reading a few times out loud to get it. He also has the most beautiful cursive handwriting ever and, to this day, still utilizes it. He is also an intellect and a walking/talking encyclopedia - no matter the subject. There are two very distinct Verns: the seasoned trial attorney, with a stoic matter and stern approach while heading toward the metaphoric, “Blood baths.” And the other is a caring persona that is inquisitive of your life such as “How are you? “Hope everyone is doing well,” “How are things at work? And will ask about what your team or individual athlete is doing. And then there is one more. It is the Vern, who is so concerned about the hole in his wine glass, thus requiring to keep pouring the next glassful. Oh yeah, he is hilarious.
The trip itself was iconic in its nature. Yes, I did try his patience, stretched his kindness, and stood side-by-side in our unconditional love selfies. We flew into Jackson and instantly were ewing and ahhing both the Snake River and the intimidating Grand Tetons. We did manage to get a table at an outdoor bar not 15 minutes after we landed. The next few days, we were all ready for us to jump in our rented van and go wherever Vern drove within Yellowstone Park boundaries. From Jenny Lake to the Grand Canyon on the Yellowstone River; the Gallatin Mountains to Yellowstone Lake; and, of course, Old Faithful alongside the historical buildings surrounding it. And yet there is so much more.
I did pick up on what Vern was doing. He took a ‘be on target’, ‘be ready’ approach. It wasn’t him being him showing me the park. No, it was more like getting me face-to-face at every turn and then being able to make my own wow’s and whoa’s. It clearly wasn’t his trip but rather a carefully mapped out one making it be mine. And somewhere down the line, I, too, found one of those wine glasses with the same hole. It didn’t take too much for me to adjust.
The 50th anniversary was a treat. Instantly, I felt like a member of the family. Driving through, and often stopping in any of these tiny towns dotting Montana was also a treat. From the charm to the surprising place to dine, each one was delightful even though we may have driven right through it. Our last visit was in Bozeman where we visited the university and took a day trip up to Big Sky.
In the end, the true pleasure was the unsuspecting time together. In each place, we found the Adirondack, folding, or rocking chairs for us to sit and have our coffee in the morning and the wine at 8:30 each evening. The conversations went in every direction, be it what exactly did happen to the biblical Joseph to which Warrior was going to get cut. Each conversation was different whether it was lively or silly, serious or mundane - each left us finishing our sentences and actually trying to avoid that gut laugh. However, in every moment, a friendship ran through it.